A peek into my weird life:

Hello friends!

I've been terrible about blogging lately, my apologies. Here is my life as of late: Work, work, work overtime, move, attempt to clean my apartment, attempt to unpack, work more overtime, get the flu, barf everywhere (you're welcome), work a 10 hour day while still sick, clean old apartment, and somewhere in there have a friends Roller Derby birthday, Pride, and a dinosaur fight. Well I was being a dinosaur (Cera from the Land Before Time to be exact) and my friend was being a bull. It's no wonder she lost... Here's some pictures to give you a better idea:

Fight #1

She got confused so we tried again...

This will not end well for her....

Seconds before I fell on her helmeted head...

Btw, I don't recommend falling on a helmet with your face. But we had fun, I'll show you the rest my recent shenanigans soon.

Oh, I also tried to see if I would fit in a duffel bag.

I do.

Day 05 → Something you hope to do in your life.

A while back I had decided to try the 30 Days of Truth. Then I got stumped on day 3 and 4. You are supposed to blog about what you need to forgive yourself and someone else for, but for me forgiveness means moving forward, not dwelling. In the spirit of that I've decided to skip to day 5 instead.

I know this might sound silly, but I've always wanted to have a family. I know, I know, I make comments about never wanting to get married and jokes about how kids are gross:



But I don't mean any of it.

I've always felt that my life would feel a little less full without having a family of my own, and no other desired experience has made me feel that way. Maybe it's because I've already done so much or maybe it's because I want to heal the hurt of my own shitty childhood. Whatever it is I want to be a mom, a wife, a grandma and no amount of travel, plane jumping, houses, or money can fill that space.

Once Upon a Time in Mexico

Hello! Did you know I went to Mexico for Memorial weekend? It was the annual girls trip with my Life Partner, Lisa.  It was lovely. Here's the skinny:

Highlights:

ATVs

Befriending a Mexican biker gang

Convincing an entire bar to play flip cup

Sun, sun, sun, sun

Serious girl time

Day drinking

Dancing every night

Playin with 200 year old bones

Getting the VIP treatment at the hotel (they knew us by name, gave us free drinks, and fixed my camera for free!*)

Low Points:

Falling off the ATV and getting it taken away from me

Food poisoning

*Friend dropping my camera in the pool

Having to come home

Best REMEMBERED Quotes:

Our safe word is: Banana Hammock

Talons and Beak. A bar or an indie band?

C: Is it me, or does it smell like Ikea in here?

C: Dibs on death!

C: Do you think the strippers are working to pay for their braces?

C: "You’re a hunchback short person"... that transcends languages

L: I feel really classy drinking beers we stole in the back alley of the back alley market

Guy: Since you have a blonde with you, it’s two for one

On the plane:

Lisa and Carly try to plan out first day in Cabo

C: What should we do when we get there?

L: What time do we land?

L looks at airline schedule and checks time zone differences. Carly points out El Salvador on the map. Lisa pulls out her Time magazine to show Carly the gang murder rate for El Salvador. Carly tells Lisa about MS13 gang initiation. Both sigh and look out the window…  30 seconds passes and we realize we were trying to make plans for Cabo. Start over.

L: They’re so gooey together!

C: It’s actually painful to watch you put on clothes

C: I only have so many because my cat steals them

CAT IN JEANS

Guy is walking by our table – Lisa says, “My best friend is a lesbian…” Guy turns around, walks back and goes, “I’m sorry. Your best friend is a what?!”

C: It’s something for your yard. You know, like a lawn gnome or a shy yeti…

Dancing in the pool is a must

The view you get for $60 a night.

This guy lived up to his outfit and protected me from a street fight.

BONES!

Bikers are so friendly

I wish I were here now.

Planking. An international phenomenon 

We have a hard time making friends

Sand burn from falling off the ATV

Until next time

Wee Bit Wednesday

1. How many times have you been a bridesmaid/maid of honor?Hmm... None! What the hell guys?!

2. What’s the last thing your do before you fall asleep at night?Read! It's one of my favorite things to do, but I almost never have enough time.

3. You just won your dream vacation, all expenses paid. where are you going?Thailand! No, Australia! Italy or Greece... Peru for Manchu Picchu. Gah! So hard to choose. I think I'll stick to somewhere on the Mediterranean Sea.  4. What is your favorite outdoor activity?I love being outdoors! Camping and hiking are my faves.

5. As a child, what did you want to “be when you grew up”? did you end up there?I wanted to be a photographer for National Geographic. And no I didn't, I was told it was almost impossible to be a professional photographer... Now I know five.  Dream killers. 6. What are 3 things your dream home would have that you don’t currently have?1. French doors2. A red front door3. A huge front porch

7. What’s for dinner tonight?La Fuente left overs! Yum.

8. If someone stopped by your house unannounced on a typical Saturday night, what would they find you doing?They typically wouldn't find me!

9. What’s your average monthly water bill?Maybe $15. But I'm moving to a house with a pool tomorrow (!), so we shall see how that changes.

10. What do you do to relax?Read, take my dog running (what? That's relaxing!), or  lay around and chatter incessantly to Brady (poor guy).

Big Brother is Always Watching

I've realized that I'm probably on the FBI watch list. Yes, I know it sounds like I'm a few short steps from wearing a tin foil hat, but hear me out:

1. Saade - Middle Eastern last name
2. I'm a dual citizen of the US and El Salvador
3. I travel internationally once or twice a year
4. I fly 4-5 times a year
5. I read Al Jezeera
6. I went to school for Political Science
7. I accidentally mentioned bombs in the airport. More than once.
8. I now have two legal names
9. My most recent Facebook friend is a biker gang in Mexico.

I think this may be the reason that I get so many hits on my blog, but I only have 11 followers. I'm on to you Big Brother.