It was snowing on my way home today. Really? WHAT THE F MOTHER NATURE?! You had an entire season to snow, and you missed your chance. Now is the time for more sun, warmth in the air, even mosquitoes for goodness sake. I know what you're thinking "but Carly, snow is magical and looks like little twinkly fairies dancing in the air". No, no, no, no. Snow is the worst. My circulation is HORRIBLE. It's bad as in, if I stay in the cold food aisle for too long my fingernails turn purple, bad. On top of that, I have a bum knee that responds to cold weather in a "I just hung out with Nancy Karrigan" kind of way. Snow does not make me dance around or get all giddy, especially when it's the second day of Spring.
Spring is supposed to mean that it's getting warmer. That I can finally
eat all my meals outside, and take walks, and go hiking, and camping,
and take naps in the sun. You know what snow equals?
 |
| That's right. RAZORFLAKES. |
So, no snow. Sorry, but "seats taken" (said in that really rude boy from Forrest Gump's voice, obviously). You better clean up your act before I start spraying the atmosphere with aerosol hairspray.
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